the big 2-0

 Age has been a strange concept to me ever since I skipped third grade.  I've always felt like I was Kennedy's age because we have always done the same things and been at the same stage in life, or at least in my mind.  After I was able to reason with my brain and tell myself that I am indeed not Kennedy's age, I lump myself with my class's age.  But alas, this is also incorrect, so then I have to just accept the fact that I am the age I am and it's no big deal.  Tomorrow is my 20th birthday and that's weird to me.  This past year has been the year that I have had the most changes in the way I see the world and how I view myself in it.  The biggest thing that I have learned in this past year is the battle between faith and fear.  They can not co-exist.  It's so easy for me to hide behind my fear; fear of failure, fear of the future, and fear of the world.  While shooting hoops today, it hit me that this fear that I have is choking my potential.  Kaitlyn gave me the best advice in regards to basket ball.  She said that I needed to do two things: pretend like no one is in my way and keep shooting after I get blocked once or twice.  That girl is the best.

 with Jess in Amman :)  Isn't he handsome?

Boy that is the best, Jesse.  Jesse has taught me so much about what it means to have faith.  Being away from him has been painful this semester.  Being in Jerusalem has been completely life changing.  I am the 1%.  I have no reason to not be happy, confidant, and successful.  I am so grateful for the opportunity that I have had to grow and learn how to overcome fear through faith.

On a side note, here is my birthday gift to you all...finally a few pictures from the trip thus far!

At the pools of bethesda with Allyson and Whitney

in turkey with elyse

Inside Hagia Sofia with my group

sack lunches....

In a water/hampsterwheel on a field trip

Under the center with none other than whitney

candid in turkey

enjoying my first of 2 magnum bars

at the Harem in Turkey

Provo Library

This is the beautiful Provo Library.

I love studying here!

There is nobody to impress here.

Nobody making obnoxious flirting noises.

Lots of open space.

And SOMETIMES...

There are adorable little kids that come running through

and that makes my day. 

p.s. this is off subject, but we have to watch a birth on Monday for Human Development, and I am nervous that I will either a. faint or b. cry.